To The Guy In Lycra

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At University, one of the extracurriculars I take part in is Badminton. The guys there are okay(ish), I suppose. However, there is one guy who I really find hot, even if I don’t find him attractive as an actual person. He rarely smiles, but he is suave in the way he dresses and the way he acts and I think deep down he knows he really is hot.

Anyway, he’s not someone I think about in the way of other guys i’ve lusted over, however I still get nervous if we both end up playing in the same match. Before I proceed any further, I have to clarify that he is straight — its pretty obvious as he always flirts with this same girl.

One day at Badminton, I was sitting on the bench, changing into my casual shoes as I do. I was deep in thought about something (I don’t recall what) and I could see a shadow of someone in front of me. I quickly tied my laces and looked up. . . what I saw was one of the greatest things ever.

It was that hot guy in full cycling gear, I mean a lycra top and tight lycra shorts, he’s bulge was well deeply impressive, I did not expect him to be that endowed if I am wholly honest with you. Anyway, it’s nothing meaningful, it was just a pleasant surprise.

I’ve since spoken to this guy in a non-Badminton setting, he’s a decent guy, even if he is a bit of a bore in terms of conversation. However, I will always approve of him wearing lycra clothing, even if its just to let me mind wander for a little while.

I know this is an unorthodox post for this blog, I mean there is nothing much to it barring the fact that a hot guy was wearing cycling clothing, however it made a difference for me to feel a slight bit of lust over someone I know, rather than being bogged down heavy in emotions, dates and relationships. It’s a bit of harmless fun and that day was a respite from a couple of months that have been quite heavy on me to be honest.

To The Guy I Went On A Date With Who Didn’t Like Me Back

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Dating is a daunting prospect for anyone. In this case, it was this really attractive Italian guy, there was a bit of an age gap between us, at the time I was 21 and he was 30. However, that didn’t seem to be a problem for either of us. It took us quite a while to actually get around to meeting-up due to him having a turbulent work schedule, as well as the fact I was writing my university thesis at the time.

We agreed to meet for coffee and go for a walk around the park that was nearby. The conversation flowed pretty well, from what I was gathering, he spoke about his past life in Italy, his work, his hobbies and passions. He was a really nice guy. I spoke about myself too and it seemed that we were both looking for the same thing.

The date came to a natural end when it started to rain pretty heavily, this was not helped by the fact I was just wearing a t-shirt and a pair of shorts. We hugged and went our own ways. For the hours that followed, I knew that I wanted to see him again. I mean it was very rare for me to go on a date with someone I genuinely wanted to get to know, plus this was one of the first proper dates I had been on since I split up with an ex.

I contacted him to see about meeting up with him again, however I was met with the response that even know I was a nice guy, he didn’t want to see me again. This was a first for me, i’d never met-up with anyone who I wanted to see again that didn’t want to see me. It’s an odd feeling, however I was happy that he did it in a respectful way, rather than ‘ghosting’ me which is now a common feature of dating.

To The Guy I Went On A Date With Who Didn’t Like Me Back I say thank you for honesty, however I wish we could have seen each other again, I genuinely did see it leading to something more meaningful.

To The Guy I Liked The Idea Of

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About a month or so ago, I went on a really good date with an incredibly nice guy. An anomaly of the dating pool that I have seen thus far. We agreed to meet for coffee one day after my class, it was a really good date — he was a great conversationalist, consistently made eye contact with me, he smiled throughout the whole date and was slightly flirty (but in a classy way). He was incredibly attractive, an Arab/Hispanic mix, who had these stunning brown eyes and a perfect facial complexion that was accompanied by a stunning smile, the type of guy that visually and emotionally I typically go for. However, something was missing. . .

Only like ten minutes after the date had ended, I received a message from him saying that he wanted us to meet-up again. It was rare that I get to the second date stage, if I am wholly honest, and I immediately accepted as I thought I wanted to see him again and hopefully see this develop into something more meaningful and long-term.

I started to do one of the most dangerous things you can do in dating and relationships which is overthink. I started to analyse every aspect of this guy, from his hobbies (which included kickboxing and amateur-dramatics) to his long-term career goals. There was genuinely nothing wrong with him at all. . . but I just couldn’t bring myself to go on another date with him.

A few days after this, I heard from him again, he was hoping to plan the next date, however I came up with some bullshit excuse to avoid it in the short-term, I just couldn’t make up my mind on what I wanted. I know I overthink a lot, I mean at the end of the day, it was only going to be a non-formal date. . . what could possibly go wrong?

Then I realised what was wrong. . . I liked the idea of this guy, more than I actually liked him. I know that’s something that is commonly heard and since I had been single for about eleven months when I met him, I think there was a natural urge by me to try and find something meaningful again. I feel like a terrible person for brushing him off in the way I did, when he asked again about a second date, I acted as if all I wanted was a hookup (as I knew that he would not like that). . . which he subsequently didn’t.

To The Guy I Liked The Idea Of, I firstly say sorry (I have the habit of apologising, it seems) for messing you about in the way I did. I’m honestly going through a turbulent time in relation to sex and relationships in that i’m having a crisis of not knowing who or what I want and when I want it. In this scenario I was a complete ass-hole and all I can do now is try and learn from this mistake and put this experience to good use in the future.